Hello to anyone reading this, I am very (x100) sorry that this blog post is so very (60,000) late. The reason is, well who I am as a person mostly. But also, (ooo cheeky *but* to start a sentence, controversial), also, because I now have a full-time, adult as F, tax-paying, job. I bagged a job at a popular American restaurant chain, as a waitress which is what I will be doing for the foreseeable. The job itself is pretty perfect for me at the moment, but that’s another story. However what is not perfect is the transition from the dreamy summer that never ever ended to the full-time work malarky. Let’s jump right into the list of things I’ve learned because really what I should be doing is washing my friggin’ hair.
1.) MONEY. This is, of course, the most obvious one. This isn’t the little league world of funding weekend tom-foolery and meal deals/transport to my place of education. Oh no, this is the majors, we can now buy clothes and dinners and stuff. I have learned that this is good.
2.) BEING EMERGENCY TAXED IS NOT OKAY. So I’d heard the rumours, the whispers and the ghost stories from friends who worked, but I had no idea what it felt like to be emergency taxed. There’s nothing like looking at your first pay -dreaming of ordering Chinese food and spending large quantities of money on PLT clothes even though you swear every single time you’ll never do it ever again ’cause the quality is so so bad but god-damn-it Maya Jama and the girls on insta looks so very good- ONLY TO SEE you have been robbed by the MAN. Yes, he’s stuffed his big sweaty hands and rummaged around in your pay packet and is probably using the money you earned to crush dreams and fund the production of plastic straws. You will get the money back, all you have to do is spend a sacred day off on the phone to the tax office. Hot tip: use a landline, don’t do what I did and give the MAN an extra £3 for the phone call on your mobile just to get your own money back.
3.) SAY GOODBYE TO EVERYONE YOU LOVE. Okay, this is a tad dramatic, however, it is still true. At 21, everyone is at different stages, some people have steady 9-5s and so are available in the evenings they are not tired and the weekends. Some people do shift work like me where they’re available at completely different times of the day and it changes every single week. Some people are still in education and some people (you brave, brave souls) are in education AND work. This means your schedules will never ever align, say hello to yourself, you’re about to get really really well acquainted. This means you get to watch other people make plans in group inboxes and see pics of events you missed out on, all whilst missing your significant other and hoping they recognise you. The only solace is everyone else is in the same boat at some point.
4.) TIME OFF IS PRECIOUS part 1. Welcome to time off. You finally have a day, a precious 24 hours where work isn’t a thing. Congratulations, you now get to spend some of it doing all the stuff you didn’t have time to do whilst working. This includes answering any emails, cleaning your home/room, doing laundry, shopping, and the dreaded washing of the hair. Once you’ve done all that if you’re not already exhausted, you can see any loved ones who aren’t grinding their own metaphorical stone.
5.) TIME OFF IS PRECIOUS part 2. This only applies to those of you like me, who don’t see themselves pursuing their “day jobs” for the rest of their lives. You’ll probably want to write/study/film/draw/get-better-at-gaming-before-you-enter-that-tournament-in-Sweden-and-show-everyone-gaming-is-a-real-job-suck it Uncle Steve-, in your spare time in order to pursue your dreams. Good luck motivating yourself to this stuff when all you want to do is curl up, watch Netflix and not wash your hair. The only solace in this is that you realise how much you want it. I suppose realising you don’t want it would suck a lot so I’m sorry if you just realised this. For me, I have finally decided to take writing seriously and so will be updating this blog weekly from now until I die (I promise).
That’s all for now,
(The picture used here is not mine, but that would be great wouldn’t it if it was shot of me in work).